That thing you do

Do you know that thing that you do?
That thing with your mouth.
When you’re looking at something that you really want.
I’ve noticed it. I’ve noticed a lot but this in particular.
That thing where your lips part and you slowly in hale.
Then they close again tight.
It controls your entire upper body.
Your eyes close and your head leans back.
Your shoulders lift.
I want to be the thing that makes you do that.



I don’t know what exactly it is that I want from a girl.  I feel like I want so many things but nothing for sure.  I have so many different sides and a lot of them contradict each other.  I want to have adventurous sex with all kinds of women while at the same time being a hopeless romantic and wanting to fall in love.  I want to enjoy all of the colors of rainbow but find a special someone to have and hold.  Is this just a common thing that adults have to figure out which they want and stick to it?  Always regretting the choice they left behind?

My ramblings questions have a point.  The point is about a girl.  Her name is Nicole and I think I might be in love with her. Continue reading

Sex should be fun

Another Sunday, another post.

I came into today thinking about what I wanted to write about.  I started my day 4 hours ago with the intention of getting on here and writing some smut and jerking off to it then going along with my day but I couldn’t decide what I wanted to write about.  Not for lack of topics just lack of focus.

I couldn’t narrow in on an idea that I wanted to play with so I just trolled twitter, my alternative-alternative account (opposed to this just being my alternative account.  Yes, I have many layers), and found someone to jerk off with to the point of climax.  Then after a couple hours of distractions I made my way back here and was still blank on what I wanted to write about, then I figured why not write about something honest: Sex should be fun, not a chore. Continue reading

Not the beginning, but the start

I’ve told this story a number of times to different people; the first time I hooked up with a guy in real.  There had been other times where I had talked about it on the phone with someone or was actually half naked with another guy in my bedroom but nothing ever happened from that.  This was the time I had actually went far enough to meet with another guy and have him put his mouth around my cock and have my mouth around his cock.  This is the story of my first time actually enjoying another man’s cock. Continue reading

More than I bargained for

I decided to meet them.  It had been a long, ongoing process of emailing back and forth but after a couple of months I thought it was safe.  In my mind a crazy person wouldn’t hold out that long.  Someone who wanted to harm me or wouldn’t go through this much effort I figured, they would just want to hurry up before they lost their nerve and if I dragged it out this long then the person on the other side would be genuine.

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My wife just walked out of the bedroom naked.  I looked over and she walked from the bedroom to the bathroom, her tits bare to the air as she dashed the short few steps from doorway to doorway.  I love looking at her tits like that.  I love seeing her in any kind of nakedness.  I have a desire to go over and and rip the loose fitting sweatpants off of her and grab her pussy.  I’d drop to my knees and start licking her cunt. Continue reading

IWTBAG – Entry 1

Its easy to forget about the bigger things in the world.  That people have real problems to be depressed about.  That their lives are in shambles and the have no seeming hope to look forward to whenever they wake up.  When I think about things in my life and how I say to myself that I can’t imagine anything more depressing than being someone so completely average I’m not thinking of people worse off than me.  Fuck them.  I don’t know them and I don’t  care about them because of that.  I’m thinking how awful it feels to be a grown man who doesn’t feel like he belongs anywhere.  Like his purpose is to just exist to benefit someone else.  The life of always being an extra even in your own existence.   Continue reading

I want to be a girl

No, not in the sense that I want a sex change or to start going out in women’s clothing and having everyone I know address me as a female name.  As hot as the latter would be in a sexual play type of way its not something I even think about remotely as a desire outside of the bedroom.  That is merely just a bit of my humiliation/feminization fetish wanting to come out and play.  I want to be a girl in the sense that I would love to have been born a female.

Continue reading