More than I bargained for

I decided to meet them.  It had been a long, ongoing process of emailing back and forth but after a couple of months I thought it was safe.  In my mind a crazy person wouldn’t hold out that long.  Someone who wanted to harm me or wouldn’t go through this much effort I figured, they would just want to hurry up before they lost their nerve and if I dragged it out this long then the person on the other side would be genuine.

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IWTBAG – Entry 1

Its easy to forget about the bigger things in the world.  That people have real problems to be depressed about.  That their lives are in shambles and the have no seeming hope to look forward to whenever they wake up.  When I think about things in my life and how I say to myself that I can’t imagine anything more depressing than being someone so completely average I’m not thinking of people worse off than me.  Fuck them.  I don’t know them and I don’t  care about them because of that.  I’m thinking how awful it feels to be a grown man who doesn’t feel like he belongs anywhere.  Like his purpose is to just exist to benefit someone else.  The life of always being an extra even in your own existence.   Continue reading

Messy girls

Aside

Where we find them

 When a guy is young he’s introduced to the world of women by only what he knows which is typically TV, movies, magazines, etc.  Pop culture.  Made up beauties that aren’t real but are flawlessly highlighted and coated over to make them seem immaculate.  He then moves to porn, typically, where to doesn’t really get any better.  Most of the time its worse.  The girls are enhanced in nearly every department.  Their acting is terrible and every little tweak and feeling seems like someone is pressing the easy button.  It only sustains you for so long before you are desensitized.  Then the natural evolution is to the internet.  Now the internet is not perfect but it provides a plethora of options for those looking to escape the same “perfect” girls.

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