Its easy to forget about the bigger things in the world. That people have real problems to be depressed about. That their lives are in shambles and the have no seeming hope to look forward to whenever they wake up. When I think about things in my life and how I say to myself that I can’t imagine anything more depressing than being someone so completely average I’m not thinking of people worse off than me. Fuck them. I don’t know them and I don’t care about them because of that. I’m thinking how awful it feels to be a grown man who doesn’t feel like he belongs anywhere. Like his purpose is to just exist to benefit someone else. The life of always being an extra even in your own existence. Continue reading
No, not in the sense that I want a sex change or to start going out in women’s clothing and having everyone I know address me as a female name. As hot as the latter would be in a sexual play type of way its not something I even think about remotely as a desire outside of the bedroom. That is merely just a bit of my humiliation/feminization fetish wanting to come out and play. I want to be a girl in the sense that I would love to have been born a female.